Why We Self-Sabotage as Academics

Photo by Monika Kozub on Unsplash

We’re a successful group of people, we academics are. We have climbed school and career ladders that other people only dream about but rarely accomplish. We know how to gather our gold stars and make things happen within our universities and higher education institutions.

Yet, many of us struggle with aspects of our lives outside of academia. We overeat. We overdrink. We procrastinate on a big project we really want. We struggle with finances. Or in our relationships with other people. We walk around with the myth that “we can’t have it all,” and we very often tend to get in our own way. 

Dr. Gay Hendricks provides vocabulary around these ideas in his book, The Big Leap. In his book, Dr. Hendricks describes what he refers to as the “upper limit problem” which is often experienced by us in academia. 

Wondering what this looks like? Well, this often happens when we publish something amazing or when we win the grant money, but then we can’t seem to relish it. Instead, we snap ourselves back to reality and find a way to sabotage our success. We downplay it with others and move on to the next goal.

But we don’t have to do that! Instead, we can discover our giftings and live out of the places where we excel most. 

Four Zones of the Big Leap

Dr. Hendricks writes about the four zones we find ourselves in:

Zone of Incompetence

• The things we’re just not good at.

There are lots of skills we don’t have and aren’t interested in developing. For instance, I have no desire to learn how to fix things in my car so I typically have no problem leaving that up to my husband. A few weeks ago I thought, “I can change my own headlight. I’ll watch a YouTube video.” I watched for a few minutes and realized it was more complicated than I thought. Instead of continuing to spend time figuring it out, I let it go. It’s in my zone of incompetence and I’m okay with that! 

Zone of Competence

• Things we’re okay at.

I’m a competent cook. I did spend time building cooking skills in my teenage years (thank you, 4-H!). I enjoyed it then. But now, it’s not something I want to pursue. I can make a good dinner, yes. But who is even better at it? My husband. Cooking is in a different zone for him than for me. So if we put that on his plate (pun intended), we’re both winning.

Zone of Excellence

• Things we’re good at and have developed skills in.

In my own Zone of Excellence, I have many characteristics, such as enthusiasm, discipline, connecting people, warmth/kindness, optimism, joy, intelligence, reflection, and analytic skills. It’s comfortable for me to be here. I can tap into these strengths in a variety of ways.

Zone of Genius

• Where we really shine and excel when we’re in the flow.

Finding your zone of genius is like thinking about Russian nesting dolls. Where are you when you’re in the flow? That’s the first layer. 

For me, my Zone of Genius begins in a classroom or a coachings session. But then, I consider that coaching is all about helping others learn. Digging deeper into that, I realize that I’m at my best when I am learning and others are learning too. As the layers are peeled off, something more detailed emerges from inside and I discover more specifically where my Genius Zone lies.

Strengths and Superpowers

Dr. Katie Linder has a comparable concept with different language. She calls them “strengths” (Zone of Excellence), and “superpowers” (Zone of Genius). Strengths are great but the Zone of Genius is where greatness is fully amplified. It’s where you naturally do well. It’s the place where you operate so automatically that it can very quickly trigger the imposter syndrome. We wonder why others are praising us for something we’re so good at! 

How do we find our Zone of Genius? Well, it’s not always easy and it takes a bit of work. In the search for our superpowers, we ask ourselves questions like:

• What do I love doing? 

• What have I always enjoyed doing, even when I was a kid?

• What would I do if I didn’t have any barriers?

• How do I like to spend my free time?

• What fits me so naturally that I almost feel like I’m cheating?

Fighting Hidden Barriers

Hidden barriers are ways we get in our own way of living in our Zone of Genius. We doubt ourselves and pull back. We start to shine and throw up lots of obstacles. We think it shouldn’t be this easy, so we make it difficult on ourselves. We do this when we’ve experienced lots of Zone of Genius moments.

As with the number of zones, we find four roadblocks that keep us from functioning in our sweet spot: 

Hidden Barrier #1 - Fundamentally Flawed/Fear of Failure

In this barrier, we convince ourselves that we are not worthy of enjoying our genius so we play it safe and sit on the sidelines. We fear that we won’t succeed so we don’t even try. 

Hidden Barrier #2 - Disloyalty and Abandonment 

Here we believe the message that others will turn away from us if we dwell in our Zone of Genius. We assume that others in our community will feel threatened or otherwise upset and we will ultimately end up all alone. 

Hidden Barrier #3 - More Success Brings Burdens

With this barrier we tend to downplay the lives of celebrities to make ourselves feel better about our lack of success. We might have ideas such as: “I’d be/have an even bigger burden than I am/do right now if I became successful.”

Personally, I often think thoughts like this: “Well, at least no one is looking in my windows or wanting to take my trash. If I were famous like Dr. Brene Brown, I’d have to deal with those things. And who wants that?” It’s a point of self-sabotage meant to make me feel better about my less-than-ness. 

Hidden Barrier #4 - The Fear of Outshining

We send ourselves messages like these: “I don’t want to get in other people’s way. I want them to have success too, so I’ll play it small in order to let them shine.”

It’s so easy to become complacent and allow barriers to keep us from our genius. In fact, I see it all the time with my clients who don’t really want to live in their zone of genius. They are afraid and they continue an inner monologue that justifies their fears. Ultimately, they want to play small and hide.

We can choose to get out of our own way by only saying yes to things that are in our Zone of Genius.

Consider making this commitment as Dr. Hendricks suggests: “I am 100% committed to living in my Zone of Genius.”

And that means saying no to a lot of great opportunities so that you can say yes to the perfect opportunity! Why busy yourself with doing only those things you are competent at so that you aren’t available when the true, genius opportunities show their faces? 

Photo by Edu Lauton on Unsplash

Living It Out 

Now that I’ve introduced the zone of genius concept to you, it’s time for application. Personally, I needed a life coach to hold the space for me to explore these ideas. I could certainly carve out the time to sit down and make myself think about it. But I need prompts and someone to guide my thought process. So I use a coach. Having someone else to hold the space for you to discover your superpowers makes all the difference! 

Examples of Success 

Doing this type of work brings such clarity to daily decisions. Because I know when I’m in my Zone of Genius, I know exactly what to say no to. Sometimes I have to turn down what seem to be amazing opportunities because I know it’s not in my Zone of Genius.

For instance, I could analyze statistics all day, every day. It’s in my Zone of Excellence! It’s fun for me! But is it in my Zone of Genius, where I love being? Not anymore. So I say no to it. Even when it seems so attractive.  

Another way to think about it is on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being something you would love to do. If it’s a 7, it’s probably in your Zone of Excellence, but not your Genius Zone. We have to be wise about saying no to 7 opportunities, even though they are better than 3-5 opportunities!  

Right now, coaching is in my Zone of Genius. And I would be honored to be your coach to help you figure out the difference between your Zones of Excellence and Genius. Read my take on why academics should or shouldn’t hire a life coach.

You can stop settling for your Zone of Excellence. Take the leap and let me help you to also live in your Zone of Genius!